Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
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