I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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