ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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