morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Randomize
