Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
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