That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
