i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize