I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
sarcasm needs its own font
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize