my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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