i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Randomize
