fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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