no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
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