i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
