We named our party play list daddy issues
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Randomize
