I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
