the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
