these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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