Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
