sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
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