yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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