Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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