Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize