you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
We are all done wearing pants today
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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