Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
