i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Please don't give away my fajitas
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
