just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
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And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.