i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I DEMAND FORESKIN
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
