gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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