38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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