She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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