i wish peter jackson would direct porn
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
