The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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