That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
