He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
