please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I intend to get homeless drunk
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
