RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Vodka?
Forever.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
