at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Dick very happy bro
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
