Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Randomize
