Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
