Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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