meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
