I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Randomize