We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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