Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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