I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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