Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
that's an acceptable place to lick
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
