You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
There's always time for handjobs
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Randomize