Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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