Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Farmville is her only friend.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
