Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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